Posted: October 2016
You have probably heard many times about the importance of learning to fail. How learning from — and accepting — our failures is the only way to move forward.
“I never lose. I either win or learn.”Nelson Mandela
Failing is an essential part of “doing,” of being outside of our comfort zone, and of moving forward. Each time we fail, we learn and grow stronger. Failure should be viewed as positive. It is an integral part in moving forward.
Still, failing can be hard. It can hurt and affect us deeply.
Over the last three years, as I have moved from being a senior manager in organizations to becoming an entrepreneur. I have heard “no” and “maybe next time” too many times to count. Even though I learn from each experience, and continue to move forward, I appreciate that failure can knock us down. It can be frustrating, tiring, and paralyzing.
One of the techniques I regularly apply is the importance of “AND,” which I learned from Dr. Maria Sirois, an inspirational speaker and psychologist. Dr. Sirois encourages us to apply “AND” to our experiences and permit ourselves to be in two places or feel two different emotions at once.
It is okay to view a recent failing as both difficult AND good. Yes, it is frustrating and may knock us down momentarily. We need to stay focused on what good can come out of it, and what the lesson is.
So whatever is happening in your life at this moment, I invite you to try the concept of “AND.” Allow yourself to feel whatever honest emotions show up. Use the experience as a learning opportunity.
Both positive and negative emotions are a part of us, and we can — and must — feel both in order to turn our failures into positive experiences.